I’m exhausted. Not only did I move into my first permanent home since Ieft New York City, I also found a part time job as a Certified Peer Support Specialist. All of this happened pretty much within the last month, maybe less. These aren’t bad things, but even good things can be tiring. For the first time in my life I am actively using my experiences with mental health and substance use to help others. My life is moving, at a fast but steady pace, but I am struggling as a writer. My motivation is elsewhere and sometimes when that happens, little things can fall away. For the first time since the launch of my blog I missed posting on time. I usually write about concepts, about feelings, and not specifically about my day to day life because who wants to read that? Who wants to read about how I finally got up the courage to drive to Target today, because the concept of driving there and dealing with the logistics made me anxious in the past. There’s only so long one can go without sheets and towels though. That’s my new thing. I think about what I’m putting off, what I’m anxious about, and I just do it. I think to myself “it has to happen eventually, why not today?” Today I took a moment to breathe. I got out of bed without snoozing my alarm clock fifteen times. I looked at everything spinning around me and I just put my feet on the ground. I decided to write, and be productive from behind my computer for a day.
So…I know you are out there, and if you’re reading this I implore you to just look down at where your feet are, breathe, and exist in the present moment for just one second.